Cooper's Hill Cheese Rolling
Contestants chase a 9lb wheel of Double Gloucester cheese down the near-vertical 200-yard Cooper's Hill. The first person over the finish line at the bottom wins the cheese. Expect broken ankles, bruises, and paramedics. This is the undisputed king of British absurdity.
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World Bog Snorkelling Championships
Competitors in full snorkel gear swim two lengths of a 60-yard peat bog trench cut through Waen Rhydd bog. No conventional swimming strokes allowed — just flippers and a snorkel. The world record is around 1 minute 18 seconds. Wales's finest contribution to aquatic absurdity.
fireTar Barrel Rolling
Locals set fire to full-sized tar barrels and carry them through the narrow streets of Ottery St Mary on their shoulders, before rolling them down the hill. Participants wear leather gloves and asbestos aprons. Children get their own smaller barrels. The town smells of burning tar for days.
foodWorld Nettle Eating Championship
Competitors eat as many raw stinging nettles as possible in one hour. The leaves are forked into the mouth, rolled with the tongue, and swallowed whole. Points are deducted for flinching. The current record is over 70 feet of nettle stalks. Rinsing your mouth with cider between stalks helps (they say).